The choice to end your dearly wanted pregnancy is so heartbreaking. It is very personal; it is never a "black or white" choice.
Published by Admin on 2009/12/11 (542 reads)
I've been asked to write "our side" of the story for terminating a pregnancy due to T-21 with known health issues. This is my story in much abbreviated form.
I was 39 when I found out I had severe endometriosis, and I underwent a laparoscopy and six months of Lupron treatment to combat it.
After completing my treatment, I found myself pregnant at the age of 40. Due to my age, I planned to have prenatal testing, and knew ahead of time if there were severe problems with our child, we would consider termination. We knew this because my niece is severely mentally handicapped; we knew the struggles and health issues she faced, and did not want to put our child through that.
We were building a vacation home in Belize, and planned to go there one day after my amnio. I never thought there would be any problems with my amnio -- I only expected to learn the sex of my child, whom I thought would be a boy. I was wrong on both counts.
When we returned from Belize, I anxiously awaited the call from my doctor's office. The call came, and it was terrible news. My baby, my daughter, had T-21. The doctor also confirmed that during the amnio's sonogram, they saw signs of heart and digestive problems. Ultimately, I was told by three doctors that there was very little chance that my daughter would make it full term, and if she did, she would need heart surgery and surgery to repair her digestive tract. Even then, there were no guarantees she would survive. We researched her chances and ultimately chose to spare her a life filled with pain and surgery. We chose to offer her peace. We chose to terminate the pregnancy.
The choice to end your dearly wanted pregnancy is so heartbreaking. It is very personal; it is never a "black or white" choice. It is based on the knowledge of the severity of the health issues; resources and family support available long-term; and impact on the entire family, in addition to grave concerns over the quality of life of the resulting child. No one can know what choice they will make until they are faced with it. No one can judge the person making that choice because they don't know until they are faced with it exactly what they will do. Walk a mile in our shoes. You may decide differently than you think you would. I know I did.
I was 39 when I found out I had severe endometriosis, and I underwent a laparoscopy and six months of Lupron treatment to combat it.
After completing my treatment, I found myself pregnant at the age of 40. Due to my age, I planned to have prenatal testing, and knew ahead of time if there were severe problems with our child, we would consider termination. We knew this because my niece is severely mentally handicapped; we knew the struggles and health issues she faced, and did not want to put our child through that.
We were building a vacation home in Belize, and planned to go there one day after my amnio. I never thought there would be any problems with my amnio -- I only expected to learn the sex of my child, whom I thought would be a boy. I was wrong on both counts.
When we returned from Belize, I anxiously awaited the call from my doctor's office. The call came, and it was terrible news. My baby, my daughter, had T-21. The doctor also confirmed that during the amnio's sonogram, they saw signs of heart and digestive problems. Ultimately, I was told by three doctors that there was very little chance that my daughter would make it full term, and if she did, she would need heart surgery and surgery to repair her digestive tract. Even then, there were no guarantees she would survive. We researched her chances and ultimately chose to spare her a life filled with pain and surgery. We chose to offer her peace. We chose to terminate the pregnancy.
The choice to end your dearly wanted pregnancy is so heartbreaking. It is very personal; it is never a "black or white" choice. It is based on the knowledge of the severity of the health issues; resources and family support available long-term; and impact on the entire family, in addition to grave concerns over the quality of life of the resulting child. No one can know what choice they will make until they are faced with it. No one can judge the person making that choice because they don't know until they are faced with it exactly what they will do. Walk a mile in our shoes. You may decide differently than you think you would. I know I did.
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